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You know, in retrospect, this is the only circumstance surrounding this madness that makes me GLAD that I wasn’t working in TV when the news hit, I just would haven’t been able to go on working. I would have had to go home. There is no way I would have been able to pull myself together to face the public. I stayed in the house for 2 days just being unemployed. I don’t even know how I drove the rest of the way home when I got the phone call from Tessa. I guess the lord was driving me because I don’t know how I could even see. I bet I scared passersby. I still can’t accept this. All of these books are coming out and credible people are speaking on it, but I’ll never stop holding out hope that it’s all a hoax. I don’t really want to acknowledge it. I don’t want merchandise that acknowledges it. I was having a cow on the inside the morning of the memorial because every damn thing the vendors was selling said DEATH! Sunrise, Sunset my ass! I get chatty and anal when I’m nervous. I was there, but I refuse to accept this. Gosh, being human sucks. I wish I were Bender. He wouldn’t give a rat’s ass. The frailty in the human condition is emotion.
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